


"You Need to Take a Pregnancy Test."

by Multi_Fandom_Insanity



Category: Red vs. Blue
Genre: Canon-typical language, Carolina and Church are twins, Carolina's in denial, Church and Lina sibs, F/M, Pregnancy
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-05-09
Updated: 2020-05-09
Packaged: 2021-03-03 00:40:51
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,177
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/24086014
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Multi_Fandom_Insanity/pseuds/Multi_Fandom_Insanity
Summary: "Shaking her head she actually laughs at herself, 'come on, you were Lieutenant Colonel Church, led battles, and fought for your life multiple times, you can look at a stick you pissed on five minutes ago.'"Carolina Church-Washington never thought this day would come. Ever. But here she is, terrified to look at a pregnancy test. A pregnancy test her brother somehow convinced her to take. What had her life become? Oh well, time to do this.
Relationships: Agent Carolina & AI Program Epsilon | Leonard Church, Agent Carolina/Agent Washington (Red vs. Blue)
Comments: 1
Kudos: 32





	"You Need to Take a Pregnancy Test."

**Author's Note:**

> There's a small reference in here to another fandom, see if you can catch it! I had a lot of fun writing this one, I hope y'all enjoy it! I did very little editing to this, so if something wrong pops out at you, please let me know!

“Alright, C, what is up with you?”

“What are you talking about?”

“‘What am I talking about’? C, for the past two years we’ve met once or twice a month for lunch and we always get burgers and beer, never anything different, never. For two years. And suddenly you order a salad and water? What’re you not telling me?” Leonard Church Jr. (Epsilon by close friends and his sister) leans back in his chair, eyes scanning the redhead across the table from him.

“Nothing is wrong, what’s wrong with a person changing their order?”

“Nothing, if you’re a normal person. But you’re you, and even though you’ve lessened up since you got out, you’re still a health freak, except,” he pauses as he raises an eyebrow over his glasses frames. “When we have lunch together. It’s always a burger and beer. For two years. Do you have something medical going on that you’re not telling me?”

“Nothing is wrong, Epsilon. It’s just a sala and water for fuck’s sake.” 

“Carolina-”

“Don’t you ‘Carolina’ me, I-”

“Carolina, I’m worried about you!” 

“Keep your voice down, Leonard,” she hisses across the table, “we’re in a restaurant.”

“C, it’s just you and me now, and I’m worried about you; I just want to know that you’re okay.” The dark-haired man lowers his voice, eyes taking on a soft touch she’d only seen a handful of times in their life.

“Fine,” she pauses, turning to smile and thank the waitress as she sets their food down in front of them. “Fine. I will tell you why I got a fucking salad if you will shut up about it after today.”

“Yes, thank you.” And the exasperated ted tone is back. Yep, that’s her twin back to his normal self.

“I got a salad because two weeks ago my favorite pair of jeans didn’t fit. I got a salad because even though I watch what I eat, exercise regularly, and I’m still having problems with nausea from my stomach bug a few weeks ago, I’m still gaining weight. Damn, people really were right when they said your body would start to change somewhere between age thirty-five and forty.”

“You got a salad because you’ve gained a few pounds?”

“I have weighed the same, give or take five pounds, for the last twenty years, and suddenly I gain fifteen pounds in less than six weeks? Obviously, my metabolism is slowing down.”

“C, I understand this is difficult for you, but there’s nothing wrong with gaining a few pounds as you get older, especially if you’re still eating healthy and exercising, it’s just your body aging. Also, I’m sure you know this, but this could be incredibly unhealthy for you in a lot of ways. You said you’re still having problems from the bug?”

“I know, I know. But for things to change so suddenly, it’s just weird. But, yeah, I don’t have a fever anymore, so my doctor said everything should be fine. If I’m still nauseous in another couple of weeks then I’m going in for lab work.” Looking down, the redhead is shocked to see how much of their food they’d eaten, not realizing how long they’d been sitting there.

“Ummm, Carolina.” Epsilon leans forward. Voice lowering, he continues, “I think you’re pregnant.” The redhead sitting across from him actually laughs out loud at his statement, open-mouthed and drawing attention from nearby tables. 

“Have you lost your mind? One, how do you even know anything about pregnancy symptoms, and two, you know know the chances of that happening are about point-zero-zero-one percent, right?”

“Yeah, of course I know it’s unlikely, but you’re nauseated and gaining weight? When’s the last time you had your period?”

“Uh, that’s a little bit of a personal question, don’t you think? Especially to ask your sister.”

“Humor me?”

“Fine, if you’ll shut up about this! It was six months ago, but I’m on continuously active birth control so I only end up having one about once a year. Come on, Ep, you’re the math person, you know the chances.”

“Yeah, I do. But I also know that if anyone were to defy those odds, it’d be you. Will you please take a pregnancy test? For me?” Carolina almost gives in immediately, just to get her brother off her back, but hesitates. 

“What would I tell Wash?” Her voice is quiet, small in a way that only those closest to her are privileged to hear, and only when it’s something very big, scary, and important to her.

“Look, I’d like to consider myself an expert on communication -or lack thereof- in a relationship, but don’t tell him yet.”

“I-”

“Look, if he finds out and gets upset, I don’t care about any bad history between the two of us, I will personally tell him that I told you to keep it from you. And I know you have your whole ‘never keep secrets from each other’ thing, which is great, it really is, but just take the test. If you want to tell him after, no matter the results, then you can.”

“I don’t even know why I’m agreeing to this, but fine, I’ll take the damn test. Wash is supposed to be on his distance run with Tucker today, so he shouldn’t be home when I get back, and I can stop by the drug store on the way home,” she pauses, taking a breath and shaking her head. “This is so dumb, I don’t even know how I let you convince me to do this.”

“Do you want me to come over?”

“I can pee on a fucking stick by myself, thank you very much. I hope you know you’re paying for lunch?”

“Yeah, I kind of figured, love you, too, sis.”

The pair finishes the last bites of their meal in silence except for thanking the waitress again when she brings the check. Leonard pays, they chat for a few minutes about his job and then walk to their cars, parked next to each other.

“So you’re going to take a test?”

“Yes, Leonard.”

“Stop calling me that.”

“Then stop being an idiot. Yes, I’ll take a test -Hell, I’ll take three- if it gets you off my fucking back.”

“Good. Text or call me later to let me know, yeah?”

“Yeah, I will. Bitch.”

“Talk later, jerk.”

The redhead places the last of the three tests -she kept her word to her brother, and besides, that’s how many were in the box and she’d never need one again- on the counter to wait the five minutes. She told herself she would spend the next five minutes productively -clean the dishes from breakfast this morning, fold the blanket the tossed on the couch before going to bed last night, something to get her mind busy- but now she finds herself pacing up and down the hallway outside the guest bathroom, she couldn’t bring herself to make it to the master bath, glancing in the bathroom door even though she knows she turned the light off for a reason. 

The former soldier jumps as her timer on her phone goes off, a wave of nausea hitting her again as she pulls her phone from her pocket and silences it. She had spent the last five minutes desperately waiting for the sound of the alarm, but now, having heard it, she has no idea if she has the strength to look at a pregnancy test. 

Shaking her head she laughs at herself, “come on, you were Lieutenant Colonel Church, led battles, and fought for your life multiple times, you can look at a stick you pissed on five minutes ago.” Shoving her phone back into her pocket she takes a deep breath, squares her shoulders, and practically marches down the hallway, turning to face the place she knows she placed the tests and flipping the light on simultaneously so she has no chance to lose her nerve again. 

The next few minutes pass in a blur, the redhead standing motionless after grabbing all three sticks at once. ‘“Carolina, sweetheart, how was your lunch with Epsilon?” Carolina hears her husband’s voice as he enters the kitchen through the garage, but stays still, unsure of how to react now that he’s home. “Babe, how was lu-” the blond’s voice stops as he turns, eyes landing on his wife standing down the hall and through the living room, stock still in their guest bathroom, small object -or objects, he can’t tell- in hand. 

Dropping his gym bag, he cautiously, but quickly, closes the relatively short distance between him and his wife, knowing that if he spooks her, things won’t end well. “Babe… is everything alright?” His voice is soft as he comes to stand behind her, peering over her shoulder to see three small, white sticks that each have two pink lines which, according to the stick, means pregnant. Oh. Oh. Oh shit. “Uuuh, Carolina, what’s going on?”

“Wash?”

“What are you holding?”

“Um… it’s… uh,” cursing herself internally for being unable to form a full sentence, she tries to shake her head, only managing to make a small shake. 

“Are those what I think they are?”

“Um,” for the first time in minutes she feels as though she has some amount of control over her body, turning her head to peer over her shoulders into Wash’s gray and hazel eyes. “So, I guess I have something to tell you?”

“Are you serious? Are those for real? I though-”

“They’re for real. I have no idea how.”

“Hye, hey, shhh.” The blond wraps his arms around his wife -it’s safe to do now that she knows he’s there- turning her so she can bury her head in his chest or shoulder. “Don’t cry. Why are you crying, what’s wrong?” As he finishes his sentence he realizes that he, too, has tears falling down his cheeks. 

“Wash…” he feels her hands tighten in the back of his shirt, uncaring that he’s still partially covered in sweat. “Fuck, David, we wanted this moment so bad, but we didn’t think we’d ever get it, and now I’m holding three positive pregnancy tests. They can’t all be false, can they?” Her hands clench again behind his back and he pulls her a little tighter to his body as she tries, unsuccessfully, to hold back her tears. 

“Shh, it’s okay. Breathe; in and out. In and out. Whoa. Wow. What made you think you needed to take one pregnancy test, let alone three? Why didn’t you tell me?” The taller of the two carefully controls his voice, making sure that he doesn’t accidentally let anything slip that could sound like anger or distrust. 

“It wasn’t my idea. Epsilon suggested it at lunch today and wouldn’t let up until I agreed to take one. I didn’t expect this, I just did it to shut him up, I told him I’d take three if it would shut him up. But then,” she shrugs, head nodding towards her hand still holding the tests. “Well, you saw them. I should’ve called you or waiting until you got home, I’m so so-”

“No apologizing. You had no reason to think they would be positive, and why would you? I’m not upset that you didn’t tell me.”

“If you’re not upset, why are you crying?” The redhead places the tests on the counter, reaching up to swipe away the tears from under his right eye with her thumb.

“Oh, Lina,” his voice is soft, soft enough she has to strain to hear it, the corners of her mouth turning up as he turns to kiss her palm. “I’m so happy right now. We never thought we’d see this, but here we are. I’m not upset that I wasn’t here, I’m overwhelmed with happiness and I just love you so much right now, Carolina Church Washington.

“Oh, David,” her tears start all over again as she buries her face into her husband’s chest. “I love you, too, so much.” She sniffles, hands clenching and unclenching in the fabric of his shirt again. “Fuck, I gotta make sure I call to make an appointment with my OB/GYN first thing Monday morning.”

“Mmm, please do.” Wash drops a kiss on top of his wife’s head, hugging her a little tighter. “And let me know when it is, yeah? I’d like to be there if you’ll have me?”

“Of course I want you there, I wouldn’t have it any other way. Damn, I’m tired now.”

“Yeah, this would explain why you’ve been so out of it. We thought it was the stomach bug, but this makes so much sense. I’m pretty wiped out, too, Tucker and I ran hard today. Wunna take a shower and then nap?”

“Eh, I don’t really need or want a shower, just kinda want to lie down.”

“Alright, go put something comfy on and I’ll join you in a few minutes, yeah?”

“Yeah, I like the sound of that. I love you, David.”

“I love you, too, Carolina.”


End file.
